Category: Primal Brain

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Getting My Ass Moving

Each action removes the barrier to entry. Each action removes one more excuse off the list.

I’ve wanted to write about personal development for atleast 5 years. The biggest barrier though was not knowing where to start. So I had to take action. I set up a website. I chose the easiest one to set up, Squarespace. Now that I had a platform and a place to write, I had one less excuse to prevent me from writing.

Massive actions build momentum.

Take the big steps needed to start doing what it is that you want. I went through the pain of setting up a blog. It was one less excuse to start writing. I had to go through the pain of publishing my first post. Then I had to publish again. I had to learn the art of shipping your work.

I started off writing long, 10+ minute posts. Now my average post is about a 2 minute read. I needed to learn to ship more often. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Perfection is the enemy of results. The post is never up to my expectations or my standard. But I have the habit of writing daily. I learn to ship many times a week no matter what. I will have written thousands of more words, 5–10x more posts as I did before. I built momentum and learnt to ship the work.

Actions lead to lessons.

I hate everything I’ve written above this. It’s not meeting the vision that I had for this post. The ideas aren’t connecting. The words aren’t flowing.

But the post is going up. It doesn’t matter that I’m not very happy with it. I have a deadline and it needs to ship. Too bad for me. That’s what I deserve for not planning out my week. That’s what I deserve for not taking more time this week to write it. I shouldn’t have slept in 3 days in a row.

Each week I post new posts. Every time I learn something new. If I want to produce the quality of work I expect from myself, I need more time. I can’t rush the process. 3 days of sleeping in is half the week of writing. Losing momentum makes my brain rusty. Not posting is a missed opportunity to help someone. Not posting is a missed opportunity for me to learn about writing. Not posting is a missed opportunity for me to plan my thoughts.

Actions keep your head in the game.

Life is busy. It’s easy to do nothing. Doing nothing and no work towards our goals is a habit. We become numb to the desires of our hearts. We start to accept the daily grind. The status quo seems good enough. The lizard brain is comfortable cause we’re safe.

The daily actions though always keeps us moving. It’s not just the hour or two of writing that I get accomplished daily. It’s knowing that I need to wake up tomorrow and say something different. It’s knowing that I am running out of blog ideas and need new ones. It’s knowing that I have no stories to share and need a fresh one to share. The daily writing habit I have is not contained between 7–8am daily. It’s become 24/7. Inspiration suddenly pops up everywhere.

My daily writing habit is my daily action. It’s the daily habit. It’s becoming my new status quo. It’s becoming my new daily grind. The lizard brain still doesn’t like it. It still tries to scare the shit out of me. But I’m moving forward. This post may have zero impact publicly. But I’m learning. Gaining momentum. Learning to ship. Getting better at doing the work.

Summary:

Do.

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Making Self Limiting Excuses

Have you ever heard someone share a vague goal, and then qualify with a “but”.

“I want to get promoted and make more money this year, but I don’t want to be like my friend who doesn’t have a life.”
“I want to start working out, but I don’t want to be like super fit like the dudes in the magazine.”
“I want to start working out, but I don’t want to look like those Crossfit girls and get huge muscles.”
“I want to go on a diet and lose some weight, but I don’t want to be like those people that don’t eat dessert or don’t eat carbs when they go out.”
“I want to start doing/going (dancing, woodworking, writing, snowboarding, etc), but don’t want to someone that spends a fortune on lessons.”

Notice a few things here …

1) Making enemies with “those people”.

The excuses automatically villainize the people who are successful. It’s a psychological slide that allows them to get off the hook from having to really do anything. “I choose not to be like those ‘bad’ people.” A condition is set, so that they can maintain their status quo and let themselves off the hook. It’s too easy to let yourself off the hook by fabricating a reason and getting people to agree.

2) Not having a strategy or plan

Lets take the diet and weight loss example. They want to eat their cake and have theirs too (no pun intended but it works). The reasons state the strategy or plan that they will not take, without actually saying what they will do. What I’ve found when I’ve heard these excuses is that there is no plan to get the desired outcome.

Cause not all people who get promoted and have great careers are workoholics.
Not everyone who exercises look like they are ready for a cover shoot.
Not everyone who is healthy denies themselves cake or wine at restaurants.

It’s fine not to do any of those things. But knowing what you’re not going to do doesn’t produce results.

Actually knowing what to do is going to get the results and desired outcomes.

3) Not willing to sacrifice

Embedded in the excuse is an admission of only doing easy work. Anyone who achieves any status of success in any area put in the work, had discipline, and took steps to master the domain. People want to have theirs, but not put in the work. So they won’t take the long cut, rather they are open to taking the short cut.

4) Protecting the failure

By saying that you won’t put in the hard work, you can protect your own reputation and self image. You never failed because you said you would only do it with a bunch of clauses and fine footnotes at the bottom of your contract.

A Call to Action

Getting what we want in life isn’t going to be easy work.

It’s going to require hard work.

It’s going to require being vulnerable to failure.

It’s going to require sacrifices.

It’s going to require you to live a different lifestyle than the status quo.

It’s going to require following proven strategies that others have used to succeed.

So let’s recognize the footnotes that we’ve attached ourselves to. The clauses. The boundaries. Put them aside, and let’s focus.

Let’s allow ourselves to dream about what we want to get. Whether it’s health, wealth, or more success in any area.

And next post, let’s look at some ways of actually getting there.

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Your Big Bank Account Doesn’t Make You Rich

“I would feel SO secure, SO safe if I had $1000 in the bank. […] and 2-3 years out of school I had $1000 in the bank.  And then I was like ‘well … maybe I need $2000, because I don’t feel safe.’ And then it became this hedonistic treadmill of OK I’m going to be a squirrel and save every penny I make so that I feel safe.  Well here it is 33 years later, and I still don’t feel safe.” — Debbie Millman

Having riches in the bank account is nice.  You can buy cool cars, fancy clothes, expensive watches, dine extravagantly, fly to exotic destinations.

But having riches in the bank account does not buy you peace, confidence, security.  The lizard brain doesn’t allow for it.  It tries to scare the shit out of you. Fearing that the number will go down too far.  Fearing that the income won’t come in to keep up with payments. Fearing that it could all go away as fast as it appeared. 

Having riches in your mind – when you have the inner confidence that all the riches in the bank can be stripped – because your greatest asset by a thousand times over is your mind. 

“If one takes away riches from the wise man, one leaves him still in possession of all that is his; for he lives happy in the present, and without fear for the future.” — Seneca

Being rich in mind recognizes that the big bank account was only a by product of hard work, good decision making, and a confidence in one’s ability to provide value to people. 
 
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